It has been so long since I last posted on either of my blogs, that I feel compelled to do a simultaneous post to let you all know that I have not forgotten about you. My life has taken a few turns since August, and I have been preoccupied with my immediate surroundings, and have neglected to make the time for my loyal followers (all three of you) out in the cyber world.
Makaya has started school (more on her first day of school in another post), and with that comes more work and responsibility than I had first imagined. I am still unemployed, but have taken advantage of that to work more on my writing, and after some very favorable feedback on one of my children’s stories, feel I am ready to tackle that query letter and really put myself out there. I have joined a new writers group that meets twice a month, which helps keep my motivation and courage up since I don’t have to go so long between meetings. Through this group, I have met several wonderful people who are excellent writers, and I'm hoping some of their talent will rub off on me. I haven’t been to the gym as often as I would like, and have to find the time and motivation to get back in there and make my goal of a slimmer, healthier me a reality.
That is all I have time for at this moment, but I will hopefully have more very soon.
Until next time...
C'est la vie...
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
For The Fifth Week Of Fitness, My Trainer Gave To Me...
…A cor-a-naaaa-rieeeee…
For my fifth and final week with Angel, she gave me a rather intense cardio workout that she did (of course) without breaking a sweat, or breathing hard, but that totally…Kicked. My. Ass.
Ah, the AMT machine…Apparently, AMT stands for Automated Mechanical Torture. This device is designed to mimic running without the damage to your joints, and it can mimic a never-ending staircase. The longer you make your stride, the easier it is to keep going (and the more muscles you use too.)
Over all, this has been a very positive experience, and I will not hesitate to do it again when I hit my next plateau. Yes, that is a “when” not an “if”. In the land of physical fitness and exercise, roadblocks and plateaus are inevitable, but you can’t let them get you down. You just have to find a different way to get where you want to go.
My nutrition coaching was just as beneficial (if not more so) as the five new routines. There were things I was eating, and thinking they were healthy, only to find out that they were putting my fat consumption, or calorie consumption through the roof. I changed my habits, started eating 5-6 smaller meals and snacks instead of three large meals each day (this was the hardest change to make). I cut back, but did not eliminate, junkie snack foods. I found alternate foods to satisfy sweet or salty cravings, I can’t say enough about the Mr. Salty chocolate covered pretzels 100 calorie packs.
When it was all said and done, I walked away from the table 10 pounds lighter, and much smarter about both nutrition and fitness.
Next time, an exploration of why you get “stuck” and don’t have any visible progress for days, weeks, or even *shudder* months at a time.
Until then….
For my fifth and final week with Angel, she gave me a rather intense cardio workout that she did (of course) without breaking a sweat, or breathing hard, but that totally…Kicked. My. Ass.
Treadmill---Speed 3.0 / 2 min 0% Incline / 2 min 3% Incline / 1 min 6% Incline
AMT---2 min Resistance Level 8 / 2 min RL 12 / 1 min RL 16
Do a power set of three.
Ah, the AMT machine…Apparently, AMT stands for Automated Mechanical Torture. This device is designed to mimic running without the damage to your joints, and it can mimic a never-ending staircase. The longer you make your stride, the easier it is to keep going (and the more muscles you use too.)
Over all, this has been a very positive experience, and I will not hesitate to do it again when I hit my next plateau. Yes, that is a “when” not an “if”. In the land of physical fitness and exercise, roadblocks and plateaus are inevitable, but you can’t let them get you down. You just have to find a different way to get where you want to go.
My nutrition coaching was just as beneficial (if not more so) as the five new routines. There were things I was eating, and thinking they were healthy, only to find out that they were putting my fat consumption, or calorie consumption through the roof. I changed my habits, started eating 5-6 smaller meals and snacks instead of three large meals each day (this was the hardest change to make). I cut back, but did not eliminate, junkie snack foods. I found alternate foods to satisfy sweet or salty cravings, I can’t say enough about the Mr. Salty chocolate covered pretzels 100 calorie packs.
When it was all said and done, I walked away from the table 10 pounds lighter, and much smarter about both nutrition and fitness.
Next time, an exploration of why you get “stuck” and don’t have any visible progress for days, weeks, or even *shudder* months at a time.
Until then….
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
The Backwards Slope Is Slippery Indeed
When you are trying to loose weight, especially when you have tried more than once with minimal success, failure is always looming just over your shoulder; lurking like a deformed, and most likely demented ghoul. It taunts and torments you with all those horrible memories of every time you have failed in the past. Reminding you of how you lost 15 pounds only to gain 20. How you were so conscientious of every morsel of food that passed your lips, every calorie healthy and counted, only to have a total breakdown that resulted in an entire box of chocolates, an entire frozen pizza (at least you cooked it), a two-liter jug of soda, and three packs of 100 calorie chocolate covered pretzels all gone in one sitting (technically, the chocolates were while standing—waiting for the pizza to bake—and since you were standing, you were exercising, so it’s not as bad). Sugar coat it and twist it any way you want, it still washes out the same…F-A-I-L-U-R-E. That’s how you regain the lost 15 pounds plus another five (or ten), but I learned something important last month when I was on this journey of fitness and nutrition. It’s not a failure, it’s not a total loss. It’s a setback sure, but it’s not the end of the road. These things will happen, that’s a given, but you can’t let it dictate where you go next. You can’t just give up, throw in the towel, roll over and die, crawl back into those stretched out threadbare yoga pants that you used to live in because nothing else fit, and the stretchy knit fabric was so forgiving. You have to shake it off, lace up your trainers, and get back on the treadmill. Yes, you do. I don’t care if you whine (though the other folks at the gym may give you funny looks and a wide birth) as long as you get out there and move forward. You can look back if you want, but do it with defiance, not longing for those pants (which you really should burn by the way), and make sure and give failure the finger while you’re at it.
Moral of the story: Failure deserves to get the finger. Hmmm…let me try to rephrase that. Don’t let Failure pull you backward when you stumble up the hill. Stop, catch your breath, get your feet under you, and keep going (and shoot Failure the bird, it will make you feel better).
Until next time…
Moral of the story: Failure deserves to get the finger. Hmmm…let me try to rephrase that. Don’t let Failure pull you backward when you stumble up the hill. Stop, catch your breath, get your feet under you, and keep going (and shoot Failure the bird, it will make you feel better).
Until next time…
Friday, July 31, 2009
For The Fourth Week Of Fitness, My Trainer Gave To Me...
...Another full body workout—yippee! Hey, wait a minute...the Ab-X is on here again? Twenty-five!?!? Seriously? Twenty-five reps on the Ab-X? What the hell?
Yes, sadly, week four saw the return of the Ab-X (also known as torture device extraordinaire). This week, Angel gave me another full-body workout:
This workout is one of my favorites despite having the Ab-X in there. I love the oblique extensions. I’ve often found myself not concentrating on my counting, and gone way past fifteen. I think my highest was somewhere around thirty. The squat to overhead press is a little tough by the third set, but I know from experience that soon enough it will get easier, and soon I’ll need to increase the weight to feel the effect of the exercise on my muscles.
In my next entry, my final workout with Angel, and the results of my nutrition coaching.
Until next time....
Yes, sadly, week four saw the return of the Ab-X (also known as torture device extraordinaire). This week, Angel gave me another full-body workout:
Warm-Up 10 min
Squat to Overhead Press 12# 15 reps
Curtsy Squats 12# 15 reps
Cable Curls 20# 15 reps
Cable Tricep Pressdowns 40# 15 reps
Incline Chest Press 30# 15 reps
Dorsi Flexor 60# 15 reps
Ab-X 25 reps
Oblique Extensions 15 each side
Do three power sets.
This workout is one of my favorites despite having the Ab-X in there. I love the oblique extensions. I’ve often found myself not concentrating on my counting, and gone way past fifteen. I think my highest was somewhere around thirty. The squat to overhead press is a little tough by the third set, but I know from experience that soon enough it will get easier, and soon I’ll need to increase the weight to feel the effect of the exercise on my muscles.
In my next entry, my final workout with Angel, and the results of my nutrition coaching.
Until next time....
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
For The Third Week Of Fitness, My Trainer Gave To Me...
...A workout that is very easy.
By the third week of training sessions, Angel and I had started to bond a little (meaning I am less intimidated by her, and she realized I'm serious about this and not looking to waste my money). Therefore, when she said we were doing a lake walk for our workout I was excited to get the chance to talk to her a little.
The gym sits on the edge of a man-made lake (just about the only kind they have out here in Iowa—calm down, I know there are a few real lakes in far Northern Iowa, but here in Des Moines, they are all glorified ponds) that has a trail circling it that measures 1.22 miles. It’s part of a larger trail system that I have yet to explore. For my work out this week, Angel had me do the following:
That’s it. The most painful part of this workout was the sunburn after the second day because I'm a dork and forgot to put on sunscreen. By the third day I was too burnt to go outside in the sun for any amount of time, so I did one of the other workouts inside.
This workout is great if you’re not feeling too good, or if you just don’t want anything too taxing that day. It’s also nice to just get outside and have a change of pace now and then too. Remember, this is my job, so I look at the same faces, and the same scenery every day just like you folks (only difference is, you’re making money, and I'm spending it).
Moral of this workout: It doesn’t always have to hurt. You don’t have to torture yourself every time you walk into the gym. You have permission to take it easy occasionally. Just don’t make a habit of it, or your results will suffer.
Until next time...
By the third week of training sessions, Angel and I had started to bond a little (meaning I am less intimidated by her, and she realized I'm serious about this and not looking to waste my money). Therefore, when she said we were doing a lake walk for our workout I was excited to get the chance to talk to her a little.
The gym sits on the edge of a man-made lake (just about the only kind they have out here in Iowa—calm down, I know there are a few real lakes in far Northern Iowa, but here in Des Moines, they are all glorified ponds) that has a trail circling it that measures 1.22 miles. It’s part of a larger trail system that I have yet to explore. For my work out this week, Angel had me do the following:
Lake Walk
Wall Push-Ups 15 reps
Step-Ups 15 reps each side
Power set of two.
Lake Walk opposite direction
That’s it. The most painful part of this workout was the sunburn after the second day because I'm a dork and forgot to put on sunscreen. By the third day I was too burnt to go outside in the sun for any amount of time, so I did one of the other workouts inside.
This workout is great if you’re not feeling too good, or if you just don’t want anything too taxing that day. It’s also nice to just get outside and have a change of pace now and then too. Remember, this is my job, so I look at the same faces, and the same scenery every day just like you folks (only difference is, you’re making money, and I'm spending it).
Moral of this workout: It doesn’t always have to hurt. You don’t have to torture yourself every time you walk into the gym. You have permission to take it easy occasionally. Just don’t make a habit of it, or your results will suffer.
Until next time...
For The Second Week Of Fitness, My Trainer Gave To Me...
...A world of pain, oh, woe is me...
But seriously, my second workout wasn’t that bad...or so I thought.
For my second workout, Angel (yes, I'm aware of the irony that my trainer’s name is Angel, but she tortures me like she’s straight out of the depths of hell) gave me what I thought was a fairly easy workout:
Seems easy enough right? That's what I thought too, but boy was I
W-R-O-N-G. I was fine all day, I had lots of energy, and I was feeling great. The next morning...
I could barely move. It hurt to stretch my legs, and it hurt to bend them. It hurt to sit down, and it hurt to stand up. It hurt to walk, and it hurt to stand still.
I have to walk up about 25 steps to get from the main floor of the gym to the area with the cardio equipment, weights, and express fitness machines. I swear to you, after staggering in the front doors that morning (barely holding back the tears); I think the staircase actually grew while I watched from the bottom step. It may have taken me ten minutes to get up those steps, but eventually I made it. I did that workout again, and when I woke up on the third day, I was still in pain. Yeah, what the hell? My legs still freaking hurt! I put special rubbing oil on them the night before, and I massaged them until my hands ached, but they were still sore. Nevertheless, I went again, and again on the fourth day. I was still hurting by the weekend, but I had three days to recover before my next meeting with Satin, I mean Angel.
Eventually, my legs quit hurting, and I was like a dopey puppy when I showed up for my next meeting, all memories of the pain of the last week wiped from my memory by the excitement of a new workout to try. I have gone back to that workout since that week, and have not had the same issues. A few days pain was definitely worth the benefit of smaller thighs, and a higher, firmer butt.
So what should you, my dear devoted readers (all two of you), take from this tale of misery and woe? Simple: no pain, no gain. Feel free to whine to anyone who will listen, even wallow in self-pity if that's your thing. However, there is one thing you cannot do. You cannot quit. I didn't quit. I will admit, I thought about burrowing under the covers every morning that week and just staying in bed all day, but what would that have accomplished? My legs would have still hurt, and there is no way I would have been able to fit back into my pre-baby jeans a few weeks later if I didn’t make myself get up and face the dragon. Every. Single. Morning.
Until next time...
But seriously, my second workout wasn’t that bad...or so I thought.
For my second workout, Angel (yes, I'm aware of the irony that my trainer’s name is Angel, but she tortures me like she’s straight out of the depths of hell) gave me what I thought was a fairly easy workout:
Warm Up 10 min
Step Ups 10# 15 reps each side
Side Squats ½ lane and back (approx 20 each way)
Wall Push-Ups 15 reps
Curtsey Squats 8# 15 reps each side
Free Motion Flys 15# 15 reps
Bent Over Rows 12# 15 reps
Do three power sets.
Seems easy enough right? That's what I thought too, but boy was I
W-R-O-N-G. I was fine all day, I had lots of energy, and I was feeling great. The next morning...
I could barely move. It hurt to stretch my legs, and it hurt to bend them. It hurt to sit down, and it hurt to stand up. It hurt to walk, and it hurt to stand still.
I have to walk up about 25 steps to get from the main floor of the gym to the area with the cardio equipment, weights, and express fitness machines. I swear to you, after staggering in the front doors that morning (barely holding back the tears); I think the staircase actually grew while I watched from the bottom step. It may have taken me ten minutes to get up those steps, but eventually I made it. I did that workout again, and when I woke up on the third day, I was still in pain. Yeah, what the hell? My legs still freaking hurt! I put special rubbing oil on them the night before, and I massaged them until my hands ached, but they were still sore. Nevertheless, I went again, and again on the fourth day. I was still hurting by the weekend, but I had three days to recover before my next meeting with Satin, I mean Angel.
Eventually, my legs quit hurting, and I was like a dopey puppy when I showed up for my next meeting, all memories of the pain of the last week wiped from my memory by the excitement of a new workout to try. I have gone back to that workout since that week, and have not had the same issues. A few days pain was definitely worth the benefit of smaller thighs, and a higher, firmer butt.
So what should you, my dear devoted readers (all two of you), take from this tale of misery and woe? Simple: no pain, no gain. Feel free to whine to anyone who will listen, even wallow in self-pity if that's your thing. However, there is one thing you cannot do. You cannot quit. I didn't quit. I will admit, I thought about burrowing under the covers every morning that week and just staying in bed all day, but what would that have accomplished? My legs would have still hurt, and there is no way I would have been able to fit back into my pre-baby jeans a few weeks later if I didn’t make myself get up and face the dragon. Every. Single. Morning.
Until next time...
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Back in Business
Now that the dam has burst, and I have posted after such a long absence, I am excited to update you all on what I have been doing since late April.
I was in Pennsylvania for two weeks dealing with my brother’s accident, passing, and final affairs. During that time, I was not working out at the gym, but I also was not eating much either. I fully expected a gain simply because I was not at the gym, but ended up with a two-pound loss. I needed this emotional boost.
Over the next few weeks, I was stuck in a cycle where I just lost and gained the same five pounds repeatedly. I had been doing the same workout for the past two months and was getting sick of it, but I still did not know how to use most of the equipment in the gym much less what exercises would be of benefit to me. For Mother’s Day, I bought myself an extravagant but practical gift (I knew hubby would not mind being relieved of duty), five personal training sessions, and nutrition counseling.
My first week, was not a good one nutritionally. I had bagels and cream cheese for breakfast, fast food for lunch and pizza for dinner, admittedly not my usual, but still not a good week to have to show to your personal trainer. She gave me 1700 calories a day to eat, 2700 to burn, and a few ideas of what would be better to eat that what I had the week before. Then we moved to the gym for the workout...
My first session really was not that bad. She put together a full body workout for me, and we went through it twice to be sure I knew how to do everything. This is what she had me do:
I was in Pennsylvania for two weeks dealing with my brother’s accident, passing, and final affairs. During that time, I was not working out at the gym, but I also was not eating much either. I fully expected a gain simply because I was not at the gym, but ended up with a two-pound loss. I needed this emotional boost.
Over the next few weeks, I was stuck in a cycle where I just lost and gained the same five pounds repeatedly. I had been doing the same workout for the past two months and was getting sick of it, but I still did not know how to use most of the equipment in the gym much less what exercises would be of benefit to me. For Mother’s Day, I bought myself an extravagant but practical gift (I knew hubby would not mind being relieved of duty), five personal training sessions, and nutrition counseling.
My first week, was not a good one nutritionally. I had bagels and cream cheese for breakfast, fast food for lunch and pizza for dinner, admittedly not my usual, but still not a good week to have to show to your personal trainer. She gave me 1700 calories a day to eat, 2700 to burn, and a few ideas of what would be better to eat that what I had the week before. Then we moved to the gym for the workout...
My first session really was not that bad. She put together a full body workout for me, and we went through it twice to be sure I knew how to do everything. This is what she had me do:
Warm Up 10 Min.
Leg Press 75# 15 reps
Vertical Chest Press 60# 15 reps
Vert. Shoulder Press 45# 15 reps
Seated Leg Curl 120# 15 reps
Ab-X 15 reps
Russian Twist 10# 15 reps each side
Alt. Bicep Curl 12# 15 reps each side
Alt. Shoulder Press 12# 15 reps each side
These are done in power sets of three, which means do group one three times, then move to group two and do it three times, etc.
Cardio:
20 min as follows:
On treadmill—Speed 3.5 Incline 3% 2 min. 5% 2 min. 6% 1 min. Repeat 4 times.
Now, I feel the need for a small aside about the piece of equipment called the ‘Ab-X’. If the Ab-X were an algebra equation, X could have several values, for example:
X=Pain
X=Burn
X=What the hell is she trying to do to me?
X=Oh my God, I'm going to die!
Just to list a few.
So, until next time...
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Priorities
It has been several weeks since I’ve posted on either of my blogs. A lot has gone down in that time. Easter weekend, my little brother was in a car accident. He suffered a traumatic brain injury that resulted in his death, but his passing was not in vain. His wish was organ donation, and through his gift, others will have a better life.
I’ve had a hard time dealing with this, and have never wished more to be closer to my family. You see, they live in Pennsylvania, and I'm way out here in Iowa. That’s three states. Nineteen hours by train. Twelve hours by car. Five hours by plane. An eternity if someone is hurt.
I haven’t posted about this for “so many reasons”.
Jeopardy is on.
I'm too busy.
It’s too late at night.
Letterman’s on.
Craig has Eric Idle tonight.
Makaya has her dance recital tonight.
Mum’s in town, have to spend as much time with her as I can.
All the while, I was unwilling to face the main reason.
If I don’t talk about it, it never happened. I can push it to the back of my mind, and pretend it was a dream.
Denial.
Pure as fresh snow.
There have been dreams. Nightmares really.
Doubts. Did we make the right choice? Did we act too soon? Should we have given him more time?
Unanswered questions. Did he know what was going on? Did he know we were there? Did he know how much we all love him? Did he suffer at all? Was he scared? Who will care for him? Is there a heaven or hell? Why did it happen to him? Was there someone else involved? Why now when he was so young? What do we say to his girls? Did he know I love him? Did he know how sorry I am?
There are ok days where I only think of him in passing and the loss doesn’t fully register.
There are not so good days where I cry without realizing it, and have to answer my daughter’s concerned questions with vague assurances that “No, Mama’s not hurt sweetie.”
Then there are the bad days. The days where I have to hold my self together, wrapping my arms around my body. I have to squeeze tightly because I'm afraid I will shatter into a thousand tiny shards if I don’t. The days where I sit in bed and rock myself in an effort to soothe an injury that refuses to heal. The days where my heart quite literally aches, each beat a painful reminder of the one that is now forever still.
Those are the reasons why I haven’t posted.
I’ve had a hard time dealing with this, and have never wished more to be closer to my family. You see, they live in Pennsylvania, and I'm way out here in Iowa. That’s three states. Nineteen hours by train. Twelve hours by car. Five hours by plane. An eternity if someone is hurt.
I haven’t posted about this for “so many reasons”.
Jeopardy is on.
I'm too busy.
It’s too late at night.
Letterman’s on.
Craig has Eric Idle tonight.
Makaya has her dance recital tonight.
Mum’s in town, have to spend as much time with her as I can.
All the while, I was unwilling to face the main reason.
If I don’t talk about it, it never happened. I can push it to the back of my mind, and pretend it was a dream.
Denial.
Pure as fresh snow.
There have been dreams. Nightmares really.
Doubts. Did we make the right choice? Did we act too soon? Should we have given him more time?
Unanswered questions. Did he know what was going on? Did he know we were there? Did he know how much we all love him? Did he suffer at all? Was he scared? Who will care for him? Is there a heaven or hell? Why did it happen to him? Was there someone else involved? Why now when he was so young? What do we say to his girls? Did he know I love him? Did he know how sorry I am?
There are ok days where I only think of him in passing and the loss doesn’t fully register.
There are not so good days where I cry without realizing it, and have to answer my daughter’s concerned questions with vague assurances that “No, Mama’s not hurt sweetie.”
Then there are the bad days. The days where I have to hold my self together, wrapping my arms around my body. I have to squeeze tightly because I'm afraid I will shatter into a thousand tiny shards if I don’t. The days where I sit in bed and rock myself in an effort to soothe an injury that refuses to heal. The days where my heart quite literally aches, each beat a painful reminder of the one that is now forever still.
Those are the reasons why I haven’t posted.
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